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You have someone you love dearly, who loves you in return. Life looks good.
Until it doesn’t. Disaster strikes. Sudden upheaval has spun your world out of control. Everything you’ve worked so hard to build is about to come crashing down around you.
Even if the crisis has absolutely nothing to do with the two of you, this kind of upheaval can put an immense strain on a relationship. Tempers flare. Unresolved issues crop up all over again. If you’re not careful, things can fall apart very quickly, which is why it’s so essential to do the next three things immediately.
1. Become a Safe Place
Regardless of whether this crisis is theirs or something affecting you both, you’re going to have to take the same approach. You need to be someone the other person can count on. You’re here to be their partner, even in the tough times.
The other person needs to feel like they can come to you with what they’re feeling and thinking entirely without judgment. If ever there was a time to be your loving best, it’s right now when you hold them through this upheaval.
2. Stay Calm
Once they trust you to be there for them, your next goal is to master your own emotions. You might be upset, angry, sad, worried, anxious, or a whole host of other things. You can even express that you’re feeling these things to your loved one (they’ll probably appreciate knowing they’re not the only ones feeling this way).
But you absolutely cannot be reacting emotionally. Here’s where you have to clamp down on your gut reaction and instead find a keen interest in what’s going on around you. Having a clear head is one of the best things you can give them right now, but you’ll never manage if you’re over-emotional.
3. Help Sort Things Out
Now that you’ve gotten a handle on the facts, it’s time to work together on an action plan. Your next goal? Be the one to strike a balance. Help them to see the situation clearly. Be someone who can help give a little perspective. Once a plan is made, be ready to help carry it out.
The world might feel like it’s spiraling out of control, but with these three steps, you can protect your relationship with your significant other and show them you truly are a team going forward.
By doing this, you’re reminding them just how much you love them and how much you are on their side. Especially now when times are tough.